


Canadian Blizzard, Russian Chapel

by Orions_Belt



Category: Hetalia - Fandom
Genre: (im gonna have these tags be Tea on the latest chapters so don’t get confused), Basch did not sign up for this, Beauty and the Beast AU, F/F, Gilbert is the cleaning lady, Idk what antonio’s doing man hes just there, Ill add more tags as the series goes on, M/M, Matthew is a lightweight, im really exited for this!!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-11
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-05-01 16:41:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19181761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Orions_Belt/pseuds/Orions_Belt
Summary: Matthew’s lived out his little life in this little town for far longer than he’s wanted to. Sure it’s nice, wide open fields by the mountainside, his friends from the neighboring town, the pretty librarian, but... he wants more.Luckily, since Alfred has no sense of direction, fate dumps change on him all at once. Matthew finds himself suck in an enchanted castle for the rest of his life- under the rule of a beast no less! But as time goes on... he begins to question if that’s really a bad thing.(Ruscan Beauty And The Beast AU!)





	1. Prolouge

**Author's Note:**

> The weight clicks and lifts, setting the marble rolling for our little story. Will Ravis ever get to play in those wheat fields again?

  “ _ Why oh WHY did I chose to live in this godforsaken TUNDRA?”  _ An old woman muttered, trudging through the snow. The trees provided some shelter against the wind, but the snow soaked right through to her bones. Five layers of furs for  _ what, this? _

Nevertheless she kept going. No point in stopping here.

She was  _ trying  _ to get to her grandchild’s house, it was just over this last crest of mountain. She checked her map. Ugh… just over these last  _ two  _ crests of mountain. 

Luckily though… there seemed to be some sort of fortification up ahead. Not a town… maybe a castle? 

The break in the trees up ahead confirmed her suspicion; no trees in a forest meant either a road, or no more forest, and  _ heaven forbid  _ she ever find her way out of this one. 

As she approached the road though, a gust of wind slammed into her back, shoving her forward a few steps. The trees shook with hollow, haunting laughter.

“ _ Excuse  _ you!” She snapped at the darkness behind her. 

It didn’t respond. Haughty  _ brat.  _

The light in her lantern swelled suddenly, and the road in front of her lit up a bit more. Against the night sky, the outline of the mountain peak loomed. She squinted,  and through some of the higher trees she spotted more lights. Hopefully that was it, then?

She wrapped her shawls closer around her shoulders, shook the snow off her boots, and carried on. 

“T-Tolys?” 

Tolys looked down at the shaking boy next to him. 

“Yes, Ravis?”

“I feel like something’s wrong…”

Eduard, standing on his other side, looked down too. 

“...Like what?”

“I don’t know… I’ve just got a weird feeling in my chest…”

Tolys quickly looked up around him. They were standing around the back of the ballroom, not too close to the king, but within shouting range. The chatter and music were so loud, Ravis almost yelled for Tolys to properly hear him. 

Quickly, he pulled Ravis around and down behind a table. 

“It’s not your ribs, is it? I thought they healed already…”

He shook his head, “No, it’s not the side. Like in the middle?”

Tolys flattened down his brothers dress shirt, and put his ear to his chest. He was growing used to it by now, but the odd way Ravis’ bones poked out still bothered him.

“Take really a deep breath in.”

Ravis did. Tolys didn’t  _ hear  _ anything weird- aside from Ravis’ heart trying to slam out of his chest. Ravis breathed out and gasped, trying to catch his breath.

Eduard turned to them. 

“I think you just need some fresh air,” Tolys said as he met Eduard’s eyes., “I’m going to take Ravis outside for a bit, can you cover for us while we're gone?”

Eduard frowned and looked to King Ivan, but he was too busy looking amusedly at some of his subjects arguing. 

“Yes. Go as quickly as possible, though.”

Tolys nodded and dragged Ravis into the hallway. The Great Hall was crowded, but the art galleries were empty—or so they thought, as they turned the corner. Empty save for a taller man and a child. 

They froze, “Roderich…!”

“Tolys? Ravis? What are you two doing out here?”

“Wait, what are you doing out here? Shouldn’t you be with the other musicians?” Ravis asked, ducking behind Tolys’ frame.

Roderich sighed, and looked down at the child with him, “...My cousin, Lyonel. They don’t like how loud the ballroom is and wanted to come see the art.”

Lyonel looked deep in thought about the landscape in front of them. 

Ravis fidgeted some more, and Tolys glanced around the hallway one last time. “Uh- Roderich, will you do us a favor and pretend you didn’t see us?”

Roderich bristled, “But if the king asks-“

“They came to look at the artwork.” 

Everyone looked at Lyonel, whose gaze had yet to shift.

They continued, “you were needed elsewhere, so they came with me. It’s a simple lie, Roderich.”

Tolys offered a grin, “That works perfectly, thank you. If he asks you directly, check for us in the stables, okay?”

Lyonel nodded. Roderich looked conflicted, but agreed as well.

Tolys pulled Ravis down the hallway to the Blue Painting, and carefully unhinged it. Undoing the trapdoor behind it, he gave Ravis a boost up, and followed. Usually he would turn to pull Eduard up, but instead he grabbed the painting and hung it back up over the hole. Fastening the door back in place, he slid down the passageway to the stairs.

All the tunnels converged at this point underground in the storage rooms. Ravis waited for him outside the tunnel, and they snuck up and out to the stables.

_____

 

“Feeling any better now?” Tolys asked.

They were sitting outside the stable doors, watching the snow. Ravis took in a deep breath and evenly let it out. “Yeah actually, thanks!” He pulled his fur shawl closer, and shivered. 

“Want mine?”

“No, you need it.”

The two watched the sky, and let the silence draw on. As the clouds cleared out the wind suddenly whipped the treetops. In the stables, a few of the guest’s horses pawed. Tolys felt for a second like he was being watched- like a crowd was holding its breath. He looked around and started to brace himself, but the only noise was a creak at the gate.  

“Tol…?” Ravis asked.

Tolys could practically hear his heart rate rising, so he stood down, “I… thought I heard a noise. 

The silence returned again with an ominous tone.

Ravis squinted out into the snow.  Across the square at the open gate, a small figure was approaching.

“Tolys!” He hissed, “What's that?”

“Be quiet, I’m looking!”

The figure kept coming, swinging a… light? From here, all Tolys could make out of it was furs. 

“Hello?” Tolys called out. 

The figure looked up and spoke, “Oh! Is someone there?”

Ravis startled, “That’s an old lady! I hope she's not lost!”

Alarmed, they scrambled to meet her, taking off their shawls in the process to drape over her shoulders. 

“Wow, what gentlemen,” She chuckled. “I don’t suppose this is that castle on my map here, is it?”

She held out a weathered map in a shaky hand. The rings on her fingers looked like  _ gold _ .

“Yes, it is...” Tolys answered. “You must be freezing, did you come here for the ball?”

“Oh, no dear. I’m headed to my grandchild's house over the crest of these two summits here.” She tapped  near the top corner of the map, “but this storm has really gotten in my way. I was hoping I would have a chance to stay the night, or at least until the wind dies down.”

Ravis and Tolys looked at each other nervously. The King allowed visitors from the villages, but this old lady…? 

Not to mention what actually  _ happened  _ under the King’s rule. 

“I… I don’t think it’s very safe for you here, ma’am.” Ravis said nervously, “our King is very-“

“-Busy!” Tolys hastily spoke over Ravis. “He is very busy, and impatient. Are you okay with staying in the stables? I know it doesn’t sound very appealing, but we can go back inside and get more blankets! It’s… the warmest place we have to offer.”

The old lady froze in place, “He wouldn’t even stop to help a little old lady? Why, that’s so rude!”

Tolys laughed nervously, “Yes, yes, I’m very sorry. If you want, we can look for some food as well? Are you hungry?”

She sighed, “Well, a bit, yes. Go on then, where are the stables?”

“Straight ahead ma’am.”

 

_____

 

Back inside, Eduard tapped his foot. He was sure the King must have noticed their absences by now, but why hadn’t he called for them yet? Was he toying with them? 

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a shadow slink against the wall. 

“ _ Tolys!”  _ He hissed, “Where have you been? And where is-“

“Shh! We have a guest—an actual guest!” Tolys snapped in as low of a voice as possible. 

“A what!? Who?”

“It’s an old lady, she says she’s traveling and needs a place to stay!” Tolys’ put his hand on Eduard’s shoulder and leaned in. “I know King Ivan wouldn’t let her in, so she’s staying in the stables. We’re gonna have to take turns staying with her; help me get blankets!”

Eduard stared him down, “Are you  _ crazy?  _ If the King notices us getting switched out like that, we’re  _ dead.” _

“I don’t think he’s paying that close attention. Look at him, he looks a little… drunk?”

“That’s impossible, the King has too high of a tolerance to get drunk.” But sure as he checked, King Ivan did look a little tipsy, standing in a circle of obnoxious nobles. He was all the way across the room, maybe if they kept two of themselves here at a time, they’d stay undercover?

“...Alright, what do you need me to do?” 

 

____

 

All throughout the night, the three boys visited her. They only ever came one at a time, and when she asked (the little one, for he was the most blunt,) he said it was because they needed two people in front of the King so it would make it harder for him to notice. But why on earth was their king so… stuck up? Prudent? Strict, most definitely, these three boys had impeccable manners. 

However… there was a slightly more pressing issue.

Something was wrong with the three of them.

The curious little boy, he looked awfully… malnourished. He was short, skinny, and he had a hungry look in his eye. Not hunger for power or greed, however, hunger for… hmm. Something different. Something better. A warm fire, perhaps. A comfy bed, a home cooked meal. 

He was so young for a servant, anyway! And with how  _ late  _ it was, poor little one should be in bed! He certainly looked tired. 

As did the other one—the taller blond boy. He had at least some scrap of confidence and sureness of himself. He didn’t look quite as skinny and shaky as the littlest boy, but he was favoring his right leg. It reminded her of the time a wounded wolf dragged itself through her backyard. He kept tugging at his sleeves, not letting anything touch his arms either. Maybe they were sore…? Or bruised. There was a dark spot peaking over the hem resting on his neck. 

He laughed it off when she asked, however, and brushed over anything else. 

The last boy though… the only one who had given her his name so far, Tolys. 

Whatever was happening to the three of them looked like it hit him the hardest. He was extremely protective of the younger boy and when it mattered, his blond friend. He didn’t favor any leg, he just walked like it hurt. He moved his torso stiffly, like something was restraining it. And when he raised his arms she saw the bandages. He was jumpy, always startling whenever she spoke too loud, flinching  _ very badly  _ when she raised her arm to pet a horse. He apologized with those haunted, empty eyes of his, and would answer any other questions she had.

Around three in the morning, they all came down together, and she learned their names. Ravis, Eduard and Tolys, respectively. Scared, shivering, and hungry- though they patched it well. 

“Sorry about all that mess,” said Eduard, handing her a bundle of food, “We were a little ah… hung up.”

“But the ball’s over now and the King’s asleep, so we have time to spare!” Ravis grinned, rolling on one of the blankets they previously snuck down.

The old lady didn’t miss his wince as he turned to one side.

“So, where is your grandchild’s house?” Tolys asked, trying to make conversation.

“Oh, like I said, just over these two crests of mountain.” She replied, vaguely gesturing to her left, “I don’t know why they insist on living in these horrid mountains when there are plenty of little villages for them to be happy in, but whatever. Nothing my old bones can’t handle!”

“I don’t like it here either,” Ravis said, absently. “These hills are dumb to climb, I prefer back on the plain with my parents, all those wheat fields were easier to walk in!  _ And  _ it didn’t snow.”

Tolys sighed, “Yes, honestly, I miss it. I hope Mama is well.” 

She frowned, “You’re that far from home? But you’re so young!”

“I’m twelve!” Ravis supplied unhelpfully. “And Tolys is already turning twenty-five next week.”

The woman clicked her tongue, “Too young to be away, _ twelve _ , my goodness. Doesn’t your King let you visit?”

Eduard wouldn’t meet her eyes. “Well, that is a bit long of a trip to make. I would love to see my father as well, but that would be over a year’s time there and back. The King… needs us around every day.”

The mood dropped as Tolys and Ravis mirrored Eduard’s dejected expression.

“You’re… not allowed to go home-“

“Well it’s not quite that bad here!” Tolys interjected. 

Eduard scrambled to back him up, “Yes, actually! We are guaranteed food, shelter, and good clothes! Plenty of blankets too, as you can see.”

Ravis rolled over on his other side again, and winced. Eduard caught it and turned to him, “Ravis, are they still bruised? You said they went away?”

The other three froze solid.

“Aaaalright, you three, whats going on here?  _ Really? _ ” The old woman stood up, and dusted off her furs, “Who’s hurtin’ ya? Why aren’t ya doin anything about it? You need help?”

“N-no one, ma’am!” Ravis stood up quickly, “There's nothing on my ribs anymore, see?” He held up his shirt, and there was a faint yellow-green blotch on his side. 

Tolys grabbed his shirt and yanked it down. 

“You’re hiding something from me. Tell me, what's in that castle? What kind of King hires  _ children  _ to work for him? Does he let you walk around with those bruises? Children need parents—or at least some kind of caretaker, where are they? What kind of King doesn’t have time to spare for a little old lady!”

All three boys looked considerably panicked now, and Tolys leapt to his feet, “Ma’am! Please, don’t be so loud! I’ll cut the formalities—we could get in  _ very, serious trouble _ if you’re found here!”

“No problems ever been solved by just thinking about it!” she raved, “I’m gonna go knock some  _ sense  _ into this ‘King’!” 

Before they could stop her, she marched outside into the snow. She may be old, and she might have more of a hobbling walk, but  _ by God, if she wasn’t the best damn hobbler out there. _

She made it up to the steps just as Ravis reached her. Poor boy was the fastest, but he was shaking, “You- you can’t go in there!” Terror was set into the edges of his eyes as he bent over to catch his breath. “The king is busy! He’s- he’s…” The old lady gave him a pat on the shoulder as she went by, and ignored the cries of Tolys and Eduard as they helped each other up the stairs. 

“HELLO THERE?” She called as soon as she pried the heavy doors open, “COME OUT  _ RIGHT NOW,  _ YOU COWARD OF A KING! WHERE ARE YOUR SUBJECTS, EH?”

Two men turned to her in surprise, and scurried over. One a bit short, dirty blond and cranky. The other dressed and trimmed like a suitor.

“ _ Excuse you? _ ” the shorter one said, “Just  _ what  _ do you think you’re doing?”

“ _ Mademoiselle _ , I am afraid he has got a point.”

The old woman’s temper flared, “I’LL TELL YOU WHAT, I’M HERE LOOKING FOR YOUR RAT KING, WHAT KIND OF  _ RULER’S  _ SUBJECTS ARE AFRAID OF HIM, HUH?”

She stomped forward, and the two men’s emotions quickly turned to nervousness. A passing servant heard, passed the news up, and before anyone knew it, King Ivan was stomping down the stairs. 

“Who  _ dares  _ come and wake me up at this time?” Ivan growled, mostly to himself. All his more sensible subjects leaped out of his way as he strode past.

“What’s happening, grandpa?” A small, almost red headed boy whispered. 

“Come back inside,” was the apprehensive reply. 

It was all anxious growing and dimming whispers, until he turned the corner by the second floor staircase. 

“King Ivan…!”

He stopped suddenly. In front of him was his third and youngest personal servant, Ravis. He was panting like he’d run a mile, and looked on the verge of blacking out.

He’d be more in the way than usual.

“Don’t you know to move out of your King’s way when he is walking?” He asked with a cruel smile. Ravis looked ready to tip.

“King Ivan!” Someone else called. He knew the voice. Smart, quick,  _ obedient _ . Tolys.

“There's a visitor downstairs, she seems a little angry, maybe I can deal with her, let us do it!” Tolys caught up from behind him, and gave him a gentle smile, “Wouldn’t you like to go back to bed?”

Ivan shrugged his shoulders, “I’m already up, thanks to her. May as well go and…  _ see what she wants _ .” Tolys visibly paled, and Ivan grinned, “You wouldn’t be trying to deprive your King of his duties, now,  _ da _ ?” 

Without waiting, he brushed past them both. At the end of the stairwell was Eduard, limping quickly towards him. 

“My King-“

“Save it. I am going.”

The footsteps echoing down the stairwell behind him got faster. Ivan sighed in annoyance, and kept walking. 

“Please, Your Majesty, consider something else? We are more than capable-“

“Maybe send your sister?”

“Arthur and Francis-“

“You can’t talk to her! She’s gonna get us in trouble!” 

Ivan stilled, and all three servants clambered to avoid running into him. He smiled again at Ravis. 

“Get you in trouble, you say? What have you done to deserve such a thing…”

Ravis whimpered as Ivan closed his hand around his neck, and backed him up.

“It is… almost like there is  _ punishment  _ for disobeying your Master and King,  _ da _ ?” His back hit a wall. “Would you not consider that maybe… it would be in  _ good taste  _ to listen to me when I give you an order?  _ I  _ command  _ you,  _ not the other way around.” Ivan squeezed slightly, and Ravis’ hands shot up to his throat, stopping mere inches away from Ivan’s hand. 

“Hmm good, it seems you’ve learned at least one thing. Do not ever,  _ ever,  _ fight back against your King. It is quite rude you know, and also…” Ivan tightened his grip, before letting go all together. Ravis fell to his knees, gasping. Ivan looked to Tolys and Eduard. Their wide eyes met his. 

“It is simply not worth it.”

Ivan stalked off, leaving Tolys and Eduard to race over to Ravis. Poor delinquent sounded like he was gagging. Hopefully they would leave him alone after that, it was very out of character for the three of them to talk to him like that, he could only wonder what horrors that old woman had in store. 

 

Well, he would find out soon enough. 

Francis saw him first, and looked up in relief, “Your Majesty!”

Arthur moved to shush him, but it was too late. The pile of fluffy shawls and bones between them sprung up like a spring flower, and the insults she slung made Ivan’s ears bleed for a few minutes before he could understand her. 

“-AND THOSE BRUISES! AND THE SCARS! HASN’T  IT EVER CROSSED YOUR MIND TO FIGURE OUT WHERE THEY CAME FROM? TO STOP THEM?”

Ivan leveled her with his best innocent smile, “And ruin all my hard work? It takes muscle to cause a bruise that big, you know.”

Th old woman gaped at him, “... why you SELFISH, BRUTISH, UNDESERVING SON OF A CU-“

“Ah-ah-ah, there are children upstairs.” He said, grinning innocently.

“WHY WOULD YOU CARE, YOU HAVEN’T DONE A GOOD THING FOR THEM ONCE SINCE THEY GOT HERE, IT SOUNDS LIKE!” She marched right up to Ivan, completely ignoring his masked glare. 

“YOU’RE JUST SOME SAD IDIOT WHO CAN’T EVEN AFFORD BASIC DECENCY! LOOK AT THIS DUMP, I’D BE NO BETTER OFF STAYING HERE THAN A BATHROOM SIX FEET UNDER! CAN’T YOU BUY SOME  _ KINDNESS _ WITH ALL OF YOUR LEECHED WEALTH?”

Behind her, Francis and Arthur looked  _ mortified.  _ Almost only an inch away from each other in fear. 

Ivan grinned, “Well, well, it seems like you know a lot about me all of a sudden, don’t you?”

He grabbed her shoulders firmly, and started walking her out the door, “If you hate my home so much then why don’t you get moving? The snow is not so unforgiving as it looks, hm?”

He shoved her out onto the steps. Before he could slam the door, she grabbed a sunflower out of her bag. 

“ _ Last chance to redeem yourself, mister.” _ She said through gritted teeth. A vein in her forehead looked ready to bust, “ _ I give you this sunflower in exchange for a nights stay. If you-“ _

“No.”

He slammed the door. 

From the stairwell, Ivan heard a gasp.

“What.”

“ _ IVAN!”  _

White hair and a blue nightgown,  _ absolutely indignant  _ expression.

“You seem mad, Katyusha?”

“You can’t just leave an old lady in the snow, she could  _ die! _ ” She yelled.

Ivan laughed to himself, and turned away to walk up the stairs, “Well, wouldn’t that be fun.”

 

_____

 

That night, Ivan couldn’t sleep. He knew he was unconscious- he’d never seen a room with walls so bright, but when he tried to pull himself out of the dream, he couldn’t. His skin burned and itched like a fire, but he was rooted to the spot. A voice kept bouncing off the walls of his mind, mumbling a curse. 

“ _There's more to being good than looking… let those boys go home… YOU'RE A ROTTEN KING!..._ _If you don’t fix yourself by the time my sunflower wilts, I will condemn you and your and your castle to descend into what they truly are, A Monster and his utensils. Learn to genuinely love, and gain that love in return. Then, the curse will be lifted…”_  
  


Violet eyes snapped open, and Ivan sat up, covered in sweat and gasping hard. He stared, wide-eyed at the covers as the words beat around his skull. 

Taking a deep breath, he brought his hands up to rub at his face-

 

…

 

…………

 

….Muzzle?


	2. Helplessness Blues

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matthew finishes his book and goes into town to return it and swap it for another one. All goes smoothly until someone wants to walk Matthew home...

          _Thump-thump-thump-_ “Alfred!”

Matthew let himself swing around the staircase, a book or two under his arm. He couldn’t see or hear Alfred from the loft, and when he quickly checked in the bedrooms under, he wasn’t there. Probably in the basement, then?

He pushed the door open, and the bright white sky made him squint. The hens squaked around his feet as he pulled the door closed, and Kumajirou looked up from outside his stable.

“Good afternoon Kumashiro,” Matthew called, “Is Al down there?”

His horse gave the basement an uneasy look, which Matthew interpreted as a yes. He jogged down the steps to the path, avoiding more chickens, and knocked on the basement hatch.

“AL?” He yelled, crouching down, “you in there?”

A second went by, before a curse and a loud bang was heard. The hatch doors flew open, and black smoke poured out.

“Al?-“

 _“Cough cough,_ **_HACK-_ **Oh, Hey Mattie! Whats up?” Alfred said, using his hat to wave away all the smoke. His vest and shirt were all stained with black coal- as well as his head. He took off his glasses and they left a clean mark on his face.

“Al, what did you do now?”

“Nothing! Nothing, I just may have accidentally switched the wrong two fuels… I think. Actually, I’m not sure!”

Matthew rolled his eyes, “Well, I came down to tell you that I finished my books and Ii’m going into town to get more. Don’t hurt hurt yourself while I’m gone, you nut!”

“Hey, hey, _rude_ ! I’m getting closer than ever to figuring it out! See you later! Oh- and watch out for Gilbert! He’s _bad news_ , okay?”

Matthew shook his head, “Yeah okay, sure, Al. I’ll see you by sundown!”

Matthew fastened the books together with a belt, and swung his leg over Kumajirou’s side. He kicked lightly, and they set off toward Coallet.

The scenery along the way was peaceful in the afternoon light. The sun peaking through a hole in the clouds to color the mountains behind them gold.

A few of the houses dotting the countryside already had fires going. Sheep out in the partly-snowed over fields, a few cowbells ringing lazily in the distance. Matthew breathed in deeply, and let it go in a white cloud. He loved being out in the countryside, all picturesque and homey.

He’d been making this trip with Kumajirou almost daily ever since he could walk. Sometimes his father would hold their hands- Alfred on one side and Matthew on the other, swinging them happily and pointing out the names of birds and flowers. Other times, they crammed onto Kuma’s back, and he walked in front of them holding the reins. It was nice, those long summer evenings- when the sky was painted blue, pink, and gold.

Now, Matthew couldn’t even remember his father’s name or face. Only white static came up when he looked back.

Matthew didn’t look back much.

The road to Coallet wasn’t a long one. Before he knew it, he blinked and the sparse houses abruptly turned into the gate’s overhead arc, and the sign that hung from it.

In the late hour, there were less people out about in town. On Main Street, vendors from the neighbouring fishing town of Taishui were packing up.

Kumajirou weaved through them on his own, stepping around children and fish crates alike. One near the middle hosted two women, and Matthew caught the eye of the one in pink. She grinned in excitement.

“Matthew!” Mei cheered, “Hiiiiiii!”

Her partner stood up, holding a heavy crate in strong arms. She paused in listening to the neighboring vendor to glance over.

“Hi Mei! Hi Liên!” he yelled back.

Mei beamed in delight and jumped to hug Liên, who swiftly caught her and nodded to Matthew.

Further along Main Street, small shops flicked the lights in their windows off. From the bakery, three dogs happily ran into the street, free from orders now that the day was over.

“Aster, Berlitz, Blackie!” a young man with russet hair called. His laugh was light and lilting as they leapt onto him, and the sound carried. Out of the bakery came the dog’s owner, fondness openly written all over his face.

“ _Hallo_ , Feli.”

“Ah! Luddi, hi!”

Matthew smiled as Feliciano practically flung himself into Ludwig’s arms. This particular couple had only “officially” gotten together about seven months ago. But they had practically been dating for a year or two before that. They never seemed to get tired of each other- still giggling like it was their first date.

The other inhabitants of the bakery stepped around them to get outside. David- covered in flour, Emma- covered in sugar, and Abel, with white stripes of both down his nose.

Matthew laughed at him, and mimed stroking his own. Abel went cross-eyed for a moment, then mimicked him. For all his stoick-ness, the amused smirk and wave he sent as Kumajirou strolled on meant a million words.

A little ways down the road, Feliciano’s twin brother sighed and closed up the shop from the outside. He started towards the Brewery, but someone calling his name down the road stopped him. Lorenzo sighed in dramatic mock-annoyance, and waited for Antonio to catch up.

“About time, slowpoke.”

“Hey, hey! Unfair, I was actually busy this time! Let's go see Felici; Erzsébet‘s ‘gonna wring my neck if I don’t bring him over tonight.”

Kumajirou weaved around a few more villagers as Lorenzo swung an arm around Antonio’s shoulders, setting them off down the road together. Matthew closed his eyes for a moment, listening to the sounds of people talking. Coallet was a small, all-around town. Most of its houses and shops were centered around one major street, but as time went on, smaller twists and turns were added for more structures.

Normally, the walkways were filled with other people and carts, but as the church bell chimed in the distance, the six ‘o'clock crowds filtered into houses and inns, or into open-late bars.

In the near distance, Lili stepped out of the library. Matthew urged Kumajirou on a bit faster, and she looked up at the hoofbeats. She smiled politely, and fluffed out her green dress a little.

“I’m not too late, am I?” Matthew asked as Kumajirou came to a halt.

“No, not at all.” She replied, “Basch is still inside. Did you finish your books already?”

“Yeah! You were right about the ending of this one, I can’t believe Alex actually kissed him!”

Lili giggled as Matthew swung his leg over Kumajirou’s back. His horse lazily shifted his weight, and leaned forward to snuffle at her pockets.

“Ah! I’m sorry Kumajirou,” she giggled, patting him on the nose, “I gave the last carrots to the goats today.”

Kumajirou gave her an unimpressed look.

“Basch?” Matthew called, stepping through the threshold. The library here was one of the oldest buildings, standing here just as long as the church. It was something of a… remodeled house. He peered around the room.

“In here,” came the flat reply.

Basch leaned back from behind a shelf. The setting sun caught the glass in the open kitchen behind him and the backlight turned his blond hair into gold. He stared expectantly at Matthew through long eyelashes, and Matthew had to mentally slap himself to look away from those clover-green eyes.

“Ah! I um, I finished the books already.” _Get a hold of yourself, Matthew._

“Already? I don’t know if we have any more…” Basch redirected his attention to the bookshelf, “you’ve read almost everything every we have.”

“Really? Are you sure?”

He held his hands out for the books under Matthew’s arm, “well  if you’ve already finished this series, that means you’re already done with the other… four. Last year, you read the set before that, plus its twin.” Basch carefully slipped them back onto the shelf, “you go through about a series or two a year.”

Matthew blinked at him in shock, “You… remember that?”

Basch snorted, “Well, yes. There isn’t much else to do.”

Lili stepped inside and quietly made for the kitchen, “It’s getting late, are you hungry at all, Matthew?” She asked.

“Mm, no, thank you though. I was hoping to stop by the fish markets, if any of them are still open…”

“Well then you’d better hurry,” said Basch, quickly scanning around. “Wait here.” He strode through into the kitchen quickly and made a right. Lili suddenly smiled knowingly.

“...What?”

“Nothing.”

Basch came back out and held out a book to him.

“Here, this is our newest copy. Someone from Taishui traded it for an older one.”

Matthew turned over the cover. It looked well-worn, and the art was intricate. A drawn picture of someone standing in a beautiful dress, and shouldering a rifle as flowers bloomed all around the ground.

“Basch… this is beautiful!” he breathed, running his hand over it. “What was it doing in your room? Were you reading it?”

For a moment he didn't respond and Matthew looked up to meet his eyes.

Basch stared blankly back at him, “I…”

Lili broke in calmly, “Did you forget? You said you were keeping it there so that no other customers would check it out first.”

Some emotion danced behind her eyes, but Matthew couldn’t place it.

Basch nodded quickly, “Right. I figured you would like to read it first.”

Matthew decided not to bring up the fact that he was almost the only person who ever checked out books, and grinned. “That’s so nice of you, thank you.”

Basch nodded again, and actually _smiled._ Lili glanced towards the window.

“Ah- The fish shops are _definitely_ going to be closing soon! You should hurry!”

Matthew blinked, “Oh- right! See you two later!”

He skipped out the door, and secured the book in Kumajirou’s saddlebag. As he rode off, the wind blew a conversation just toward the edge of his hearing.

“Brüderhertz, I haven’t seen you draw like that in ages.”

“Shh.”

The tips of his ears turned pink.

 

Along the road to the other end of town, someone else called his name.

“Maaaaatt!”

Kumajirou stopped on instinct, and Matthew’s heart soared.

“Gil?”

A head of white hair crashed into as much of his chest as it could reach. He quickly brought his arms up to return the hug.

“I feel like it's been forever since I’ve seen ya, how’ve ya been?” Gil yelled happily, moving back and reaching up to ruffle Matthew’s hair.

Matthew ducked his head, laughing. “Fine, thank you. I was just heading for the fish markets, do you want to c-“

Gilbert slipped the reins out of Matthew’s hands. “Yeah, let’s go!”

Gilbert was… sort of an all-around guy. He spent a lot of time being bossed around in the Brewery by Erzsébet (fairly, though, since too much time alone in there led to him becoming blackout drunk.) He shows up in the library now and then to say hi to Basch and chat with Lili. He sits in the bakery and teases his little brother Ludwig (mercilessly); and after dark, he usually just hung out wherever everybody else was.

He was always pleasant company- even if he did brag. Most of what he seemed to talk about were genuine deeds. There were of course, times where he was joking, but they were always turnable. If Matthew fed into his bragging too much, it made him a blushing mess.

Gilbert only truly gave himself the praise he thought he deserved.

He also… liked to give _Matthew_ the uh, ‘praise he thought he deserved.’ Alfred said he was flirting, but Matthew found himself enjoying it. No one else really spoke to him in a kind way like that.

“-and your hair!” Gilbert was going on about now, “Did you do something with it? Imani has some weird stuff she puts on hers, do you use that? It looks so much softer today.” Matthew felt something inside him puff up its chest proudly.

“No, actually. I did take the time to brush it this morning, though.”

“It’s beautiful.” Gilbert sang as they made eye contact. _Just like you!_ hung unspoken in the air.

“I wish I could do something with my hair, this damn mop always stays dry and rough!” To back up his statement, Gilbert frazzled it up.

Matthew hummed playfully, “Oh, I don’t think it looks that bad.”

“Ya don’t?”

Matthew smiled wider- suddenly realising that he hadn’t stopped grinning since Gil walked up to him, “No. It… suits you, if that makes any sense. In a good way.”

Gilbert seemed caught between bolstering at the praise, or being flustered at the compliment. A few onlookers smiled happily.

The fish market was mostly closed, but as Matthew hoped, Mei and Liên were still only beginning to wrap up. An old lady dropped a few coins in Liên’s hand, and left her with a polite ‘thank you, dear’.

Mei perked up as they came closer.

“Matthew, Gilbert!” She called.

“Hi Mei!” Matthew said, once they were close enough to hear his voice, “what do you two have left?”

“Oh, just some Cod, Herring, a few good Perches. Liên caught a real good Pike the other day!”

”Woah, wait, really?” Gilbert admired, leaning against Kumajirou. “Aren’t they y’know… supposed to be really aggressive?”

Liên smirked, “Yep.”

“We’re still in the process of cutting the thing up! It’s hard to get the smaller bones out without messing up the scales and stuff.” Mei said pridefully, standing closer to Liên.

“You’re welcome to come down when it’s ready if you want, Matthew.” Said Liên.

He looked up from picking at a Perch, “Really?”

Mei looped her arm through Liên’s, “Yeah, of course! I’m sure Kiku would be glad to see you too! Alfred should come as well!”

Matthew kept his smile, but quickly looked over at Gilbert out of the corner of his eye. His expression was only slightly darkened.

“That would be great, thank you!”

                               _____

Gilbert walked him to the edge of town, as far as they both could go before they’d be distinguishable from the house. Gilbert who had _insisted_ on paying for the fish, handed Matthew the package.

“I’m glad I got to see you today, Matt. Really.” He gave Matthew a small smile.

Matthew laughed, and let Gilbert’s hand brush some of his hair behind his ear, “Me too. I’m sorry I don’t get out more, I just prefer being at home.”

Gilbert frowned slightly, “You always say that but…” He looked at the speck of the house by the cresting hill, “are you sure that’s the only reason? It makes me nervous to leave you there with… him. He isn’t keeping you there?”

He sighed, “No, Gil. Genuinely, I think the only person Alfred is a true threat to is himself. He would never do anything to hurt me… at least not on purpose.”

“That’s not easing any suspicions…”

Matthew shrugged, “Well then, be suspicious. You two have been able to at least get along somewhat. Deep down, I think he really doesn’t hate you. All his reasons are just… shallow. He’s not always like that.”

Gilbert looked from the hill and back to Matthew, and then to the hill again, “If you’re sure…”

Matthew reached up to hold Gilbert’s face in his hand in an attempt to smooth over his worry. He leaned into it, but still looked pensive. Matthew thought for a moment.

“Here. If he was really trying to control me, I would be too afraid to do this.”

Gently, Matthew rocked up onto his toes. He held eye contact with Gil for a second, before kissing the corner of his mouth.

He pulled away, and watched Gilbert’s stunned expression. Gilbert held his shoulders tighter.

“You missed.”

Matthew swatted him playfully, “I _meant_ to do that, silly! It’s supposed to be romantic!”

Without warning Gilbert surged forward and kissed him fully on the mouth. Matthew made a noise of surprise, before melting into him. Gilbert was warm and sturdy - and he smelled like green apples and sunrise.

He pulled back, then carefully re-adjusted Matthew’s glasses on his nose with a smirk, “How’s _that_ for romantic?”

“...Good, really good...”

                                _____

By the time he arrived home, the sun had sunk below the far mountains. Matthew wrapped Gilbert’s sweater tighter around him, wishing for a lantern. The snow crunched loudly under Kumajirou’s hooves, and the dark clouds had completely taken over the sky. Matthew didn’t like the feeling of the wind picking up.

“Mattie?” Alfred shouted over the howling, standing at the top of the stairs, “That you?”

“Yes! I’m back!” He responded.

In front of his house, he slipped out of the saddle and led Kumajirou to the stables. Alfred joined him after a second, and picked up the book resting on the divide.

“Woah, where’d you get this one?” He marveled, squinting at the cover, “Did Lili paint it?”

“No, actually, I think Basch might have.” Matthew unbuckled the saddle strap with a laugh, “He actually got quiet for a second when he gave it to me, I think he wasn’t expecting me to ask. Lili had to save him.”

Alfred grinned, “No way, you’re pulling my leg. He really just what… stood there?”

“Yeah, it was kind of cute honestly. I don’t know why he went through all the work of carving and painting this cover, he should have kept it.”

Alfred watched in silence as Matthew hung the saddle on it’s rack, and quickly brushed through Kumajirou’s mane.

“Y’know Mattie… I think he really likes you.”

He almost dropped the brush, “What!?”

“He’s always weird around you! Normally he couldn’t give a flying _fuck_ about any of us!” Alfred gestured at nothing, “all he cares about are his books and his sister. And you! That’s gotta mean something.”

A voice in the back of his head agreed. _He’s...sort of right._ He thought of wheat-blond hair and stern green eyes.

Matthew felt his face heating up, “Al, I think he was just being nice. I’m the only person who really borrows books anyway-”

“Yeah, the only person he _lets_ borrow books-”

“-And he likes other people!”

Kumajirou snorted.

“Oh yeah? Like who.” Alfred pried.

“W-well, uh… he doesn’t seem to hate Ludwig!”

“They’re like… distant family or something.”

Matthew traded the comb for a brush, and briskly went over Kumajirou’s back, “What about… um…”

Alfred raised an eyebrow, ”Hmm?”

“...His goats?”

“Ha! See? You’re basically the only one! I’m tellin’ ya, you’ve got a chance!”

He dropped the comb and brush into their little box, and set it aside, “No way, Al.”

“Aww, why not? I think he’s… well… I could get used to him. He’d be a lot better for you than that bleached rat anyway.”

Matthew sighed in defeat, and Kumajirou followed him out of the stable.

“So _that’s_ what this is all about.” He grabbed the book from Alfred’s arms.

“Well I mean, it’s not like Gibert would ever think about someone else long enough to ever…”

He trailed off as Matthew pulled ahead.

“...That’s his sweater, isn’t it.”

“Mhmm.”

                               ______

In the kitchen, Matthew unwrapped the herring and haddock, and spread oil on the pan. Mei and Liên usually made the first few cuts for him around the head, so all that was left to do with his knife was to slice down the side. Alfred fiddled with the stove’s fire a few feet from him. He felt the warm glow light up his face. It wasn’t easy to see, but out of the corner of his eye, Matthew was frowning- not just out of concentration.

Kumajirou wandered around briefly, before deciding to push open the door into Matthew’s room and clamber onto his bed.

The silence pushed down on their shoulders, before Alfred broke it.

“...He’s not a colt anymore, you know. He’s gonna break that bed.”

Matthew rolled his eyes, “He’s barely half as high as a normal horse, he’ll be fine.”

“He’s two times denser than one.”

His brother smirked, “Rude.”

Alfred stepped aside as Matthew brought the pan over to the stove, and gently laid the fish in one by one.

“...I meant what I said earlier. Every time I say it, I mean it.”

Matthew immediately tensed back up, “...Hm.”

Alfred watched as the oil began to sizzle.

“Come _on_ Mattie, you know how I feel about him - It’s the last thing I say _every time_ you leave for town. And every time you come back I can tell you’ve been with him!”

He stalked around to Matthew’s other side, “Do you not believe me?”

He sighed, “No, no I don’t, Al.”

“ _Why?”_

“Because none of your reasons are ever good!” He said in a more lower pitch than usual, “Nothing you say ends up being true.”

The oil popped, and they both jumped to fetch a fork. Matthew held his hand out for it.

“How am I not making any sense- he’s only sticking around you because you puff up his ego with all those damn compliments!” _Almost like you really do think he’s better than me…_

“I’ve never lied to him once.”

“You’re letting him _in_ too much Mattie… In the end, he only cares about himself. He’d never be able to see past his own pride. He can’t… He’s not capable of loving you.”

Matthew took the pan off the stove and set it down quietly on the table.

“...I think you’re wrong. I can’t tell why you don’t like him, but that isn’t it. Gilbert is kind and funny, he gave me his sweater because he was worried I’d be too cold coming home, not because he wanted to brag.”

His face was totally blank, “You hate him for no reason other than that he likes me. Why only him? Why not… Basch, if you think he likes me so much as well?”

Alfred put his elbows on the table, and grabbed at his hair. _Because,_ his head spit, _Basch wouldn’t try to keep you away from me. Gilbert’s selfish- he already HAS a family. Why does he need mine too…_

“Because Basch isn’t a complete idiot.”

Matthew poked at his food, “There you go again with useless insults.”

Alfred raised his arms, but stopped before he could slam them down on the table, “ _Well?_ Tell me, what does Gilbert have to offer that’s so good then, huh?”

“He worries about me. He knows I always stay home, and even if I love to read, I stay home _a lot.”_ The fire illuminated the cold purple in his eyes, “I had to talk him down from thinking you were controlling me. That maybe I don’t leave to see him more often because I don’t want to hear what _you_ say about it.”

Alfred watched him with wide eyes. It felt like something hung between them. _Mattie isn’t… afraid of me, is he? All I want is for him to stick around. Did I… did I mess up?_

“Mattie-“

“He wouldn’t listen until I kissed him.”

_Snap._

Pain bloomed in his chest. _It’s too late._

“You… you…”

“I will love who I want to love, Alfred. I don’t know _why_ you hate him, but i’m tired of all your petty arguments.”

... _Damn him. DAMN HIM._ His thoughts screeched.

Matthew waited for a response, but turned back to his plate after it was clear he wasn't getting one. Alfred’s mind was scrambling to come up with something, anything. ‘You’re too good for him.’ or ‘He can’t support you any better than I can…’

He said nothing.

Gilbert already was loved, by his own brother, by Erzsébet, Emma and David too. The town adored him and his shining personality, all grins and his _witch cackle_ of a laugh.

Alfred… didn’t have that. He went out into town often, yeah, he knew Basch and Lili just as well as Matthew did. Feliciano, always thinking of food or that weird stray he picked up. Folks from Taishui. But no one really, _actually_ liked him ever since their father passed away. His memories were botched, but he would take on any punishment for his family. Family was all he had.

Now… well, now all that was left of his family was his brother. All he wanted was to keep his brother close.

But… maybe he’d gone too far. Matthew wasn’t something he should try to control, but he was so afraid that if he let go… he would slip through his fingers.

Looks like he did that anyway.

It was pitch black outside, and if he had to guess, maybe around eight. Matthew brought his plate to the kitchen sink, and began to rinse it off. Alfred stood and waited for him to move, before slipping his in over it.

“I… need to leave early tomorrow.” He said in the void, “To get to Taishui.”

Matthew nodded, “better get to sleep then.”

Alfred hesitated, before pulling him into a tight hug. He felt Matthew press his face into his shoulder, sighing deeply.

“Be safe.” Matthew mumbled, “please.”

“I will.”  


The firelight cast over the room, and in the low flames, shadows spun in a foxtrot. The decapitated head of the herring on the counter shone red, and mirth danced in its sightless eyes.

                                ______

In the morning, the sun had barely begun to color the clouds periwinkle. Kumajirou looked annoyed at being woken up so early, but obediently held still while Alfred hooked the cart up to his front.

The first hint of snowflakes began to fall and Matthew dusted them off his hood. Alfred finished tying down whatever it was he had in that cart, and stepped up onto the saddle.

Matthew waved as he watched Alfred start along the road away from town- headed through the fields that led up to the mountains. Once Alfred was gone, he turned around numbly and went back to bed.

He woke up cuddling both the book and the sweater.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “I was raised up believing, I was somehow unique. Like a snowflake- distinct among snowflakes, distinct in each way you can see. But after some thinking, i’d say i’d rather be, a functioning cog in some great machinery serving something beyond me. But I don’t, I don't know what that will be!”  
> -Helplessness Blues, The Fleet Foxes
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading this chapter!!! Sorry it took so long to upload, I’ve been a little busy as of late. But now that i’m back i’ll have time to work some more! Also for clarification; Kumajirou is a Yucatan Horse! They’re pretty small compared to other horses, and they’re one if the only breeds that can survive in the arctic circle. I didn’t know how to explain/fit in Matthew just having a whole ass polar bear, but Kumajirou is amazing, so I just fit him in as a funky horse.
> 
> (Also for those who don’t know, a Red Herring is a sort of sign for things! It can mean you’re being decided, or focusing on the wrong thing.)


	3. Lemon Boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matthew needs some time to think. Basch or Gilbert...? Erzsébet knowsTM.

“Matt... Matt...hey? Matthew?”

Matthew quickly picked his head up off the bar table, almost beaning Gilbert in the nose. 

“Oh! I’m sorry, are you okay?” He said, still blinking. He’d almost dozed off again, lost in thought from the conversation he had with Alfred the previous night.

Concern colored Gilbert's eyes, “I’m fine, of course! Are  _ you  _ okay? Is there something on the wall?”

Matthew hook his head, “No, ahaha… I’m just… I didn’t sleep well last night. Sorry about your sweater by the way, I tried to dry it…”

“Nah, it’s okay! I can handle a little bit of wet!” Gilbert laughed, hands on his hips.

“ _ Gilbert!”  _ Erzsébet shouted from the back, “Quit flirting and keep washing!”

“Yeah, yeah!”

He winked at Matthew before hefting up his water bucket and rag. Matthew quietly watched him go.

_ Well, I definitely have feelings for him…  _ He thought, turning to look out the window,  _ but… I have to admit. Basch is very pretty. Who am I supposed to choose…? _

He’d kissed Gilbert before, and if they saw each other more they’d practically be dating… but Basch was alluring in a different way. 

A quieter lover… with a house full of books. He looked cold and hard on the outside, but that was just the protective layer. Alfred was right on this one, he definitely saw Matthew in a different light. Basch listened to him when he spoke… and took the time to  _ paint a book  _ for him. Even that time a few years ago… Lili had fallen and scraped her knee while out with the goats. Matthew walked in on Basch wiping away her tears and rinsing the wound with cold water. He’d been embarrassed, of course, but Matthew reassured him before he could pull his walls up. ‘It’s a good big-brother thing to do, helping out your little sister when she gets hurt,’ he said. 

Basch just blushed harder and went back to cleaning.

Matthew felt himself smile at the memory. Basch’s face held a flush well. 

And then, there was Gilbert.

Gilbert, as loud and brash as a lioness in heat. 

He was always swinging his arm around Matthew’s shoulders, pressing their cheeks together. He was quite the gentleman when he wanted to be, always holding doors and pulling out seats. Finding  _ any  _ excuse to pay in Matthew’s place. 

And all the  _ praise.  _

While Basch made him blush just by  _ being,  _ Gilbert made him blush by  _ doing.  _ He didn’t disregard what he had to say, and he always quieted himself down to hear Matthew’s whisper. 

He  _ noticed  _ when Matthew looked nervous, and he could tell when Alfred was getting to him. He  _ saw  _ Matthew- really  _ paid attention  _ to him in a way that others didn’t. 

Matthew sighed and laughed softly as he watched Gilbert from across the room. He and Antonio were pretending to play guitar on brooms. 

_ I… love them both. Basch is… my, he is many things, and Gilbert is even more. They’re the only two that ever really  _ see  _ me- aside from maybe Mei and Liên. Even there, though, there's a huge difference. _

But… there was a small tie breaker. 

He was much, much closer to Gilbert than Basch at this point. It would leave Gil heartbroken if he left him now- especially after last night. But… Basch would feel almost the same amount of pain. 

Maybe he should have just kissed Gilbert on the cheek instead. Then he could compensate by kissing Basch too. 

He thought of the forest-fire blush that would consume Basch’s face if he ever dared to do that, and grinned

 

Gilbert and Antonio finished their show with a flourish, and Matthew clapped jokingly as Gilbert blew him a kiss from across the room.

_ ‘Come on Mattie! You know how I feel about him!’ _

A chill ran up Matthew’s back.  _ That’s… also right.  _ He thought. 

_ Alfred wants a choice. He shouldn’t be in control of me but… I really love him too. I don’t want to hurt him either.  _

Matthew loved Basch- and Alfred endorsed him. Would it really be so bad…? A lifetime of library visits and baby goats. He wouldn’t mind having a younger sister…

But, then again - rough white hair and days at the market. He would miss Gilbert’s cackle and the sweet almost soft upturn of his nose. Alfred would turn from him even more, but Matthew wouldn't feel like he was under his brother’s control. Gilbert was one of the only things Alfred couldn’t control. 

He let his head slip back on the table with a drawn out, long-suffering groan. A drink clacked down in front of him.

Erzsébet smiled down at him, “It’s on the house. You looked like you needed one.”

_ Oh dear. _

                             _____

 

Later that afternoon, Matthew stumbled into the library. Lili looked up from her desk in surprise. 

“Matthew?”

_ I need to see for myself. Gotta weigh both options… _

Lili tilted her head, “Um… what are you talking about?”

_ Shit, I said that out loud? _

“...Oh dear, Matthew are you dr-“

“Lili?” Basch yelled from somewhere within the house, “Who are you talking to?”

He stomped out of the kitchen in his coat, scanning the room like he expected some beefy burglar. When he saw Matthew, his posture immediately eased up. 

“What? You’re back already? Don’t tell me you already finished the book-“

Basch frowned at Lili frantically swiping her hand across her neck. 

“Baaaasch!” Matthew sang, tripping over his own feet. He swung his arms around Basch’s shoulders- realizing with delight that if he stood on his toes, he could easily rest his chin on Basch’s head.

Judging by Lili’s expression (is it possible to choke on laughter?) and Basch’s sudden tense posture, he’d done just that. 

“W-What the hell are you doing?” Basch shrieked.

Matthew giggled, “Affection.”

“ _ He’s drunk! _ ” Lili mouthed, still obviously trying not to laugh.

Basch made a noise like a growl, “Great. Where’s your brother?”

“Hezz out’f town. Came to see Gil… ‘nd you!” Matthew loosened his arms, and pulled Basch closer to him, “I missed you…”

Basch’s entire face burned up to his ears. Lili was hiding her grin in her hands. 

“Y-you-  _ me? _ “ Basch squacked, trying to pry Matthew’s arms off himself.

Matthew leaned over to look at him face-to-face, “you  sell yourself too short,  _ mon beau. _ You’re good company.” Basch looked like he couldn’t decide weather to shove Matthew away or cover his face with his hands. 

Pretty green eyes were narrowed in a mix of confusion and disbelief. 

Basch didn’t seem to want to respond. 

Matthew grinned, “Mon beau. Mon loup. Mon cheri~”

Basch looked stiff, so Matthew grabbed his hands and lifted them up.

“ _ What  _ are you doing!?” Basch stammered, making to yank them backward. Matthew gave him his best puppy dog eyes,

“Dancing?”

“... _ why?” _

“Because you’re so stiff!”

Basch’s flush reached his collarbones. 

“Pfft- hAHAHAHA!” Lili doubled over in her chair and kicked her legs.

“Stop laughing!” Basch said, puffing up like a threatened cat.

“ _ Brüderhertz,  _ your  _ face!” _

“What’s wrong with it?”

Lili paused long enough to take a few gasps of air, looked up, and burst out laughing again. Matthew looked back to Basch. 

“What are you looking at?”

Matthew thought for a moment, “you have beautiful eyes.”

Basch yelled in frustration, and clamped his hands over his ears. His face was so red that all the blood had to have congregated in his upper body. Matthew wondered if Basch could feel his toes.

Someone knocked at the door, and Lili stopped cackling long enough to look up.

“Ah- hi, David! I just- I-  _ whew. _ ”

The baker poked his head through the door to scan the room. 

“We can hear you from all the way down the street. Is everything…”

He stopped in suprise when he saw Matthew clinging to Basch.

“...Good Lord, is he  _ drunk _ ?”

“N- * _ hic*  _ No.”

 

                            ______

 

“-so then Erzsébet set a beer down in front of me, and by the time Gil… bert was done cleaning, I think I asked for two more.”

“And they just let you wander off drunk?”

“Well… kinda. I told Gil where I was going.”

“Uh-huh…”

A few minutes after all… that, in the library, David had helped Lili convince Matthew to calm down and let go of Basch. Since they had nothing else to do with him, Basch had taken him out to the field near the goat’s grazing land. For now, it was just them, the snow, the goat bells, and a grey sky. 

Basch laid quietly, listening, but staring up at the clouds. Matthew continued to talk in the odd silence.

“-and then I came to find you! Gil was gonna walk me over, but Erzsébet needed help in the back.”

“Hm.”

Matthew’s drunken mind sluggishly wandered over to the man next to him. His hood was up since they were on the ground, and the grey-black fur framed his face wonderfully. His hair spilled out of it here and there- like pale gold. Basch’s eyes were calm. Conflicted, maybe, but calm. 

His flush was down to just his cheeks and nose now from the cold. 

Or so Matthew thought. 

“Did you mean that?” Basch said after Matthew stopped talking. 

“Huh? Mean wha’?”

Basch looked away from him, “...That you missed me.”

“Yes, of course!” Matthew chirped.” I really do enjoy your company.”

Basch’s face reddened again. 

“...you- * _ hic*  _ ugh… you have a really nice blush.”

“I-  _ what?” _

Matthew rolled over to look at him, “You blush easily, and it stays for awhile. I think it’s cute.”

Basch looked at him warily, but didn’t cover his face. 

A lone crow flew overhead, cawing for family that maybe was there, maybe wasn’t. The goats that weren't in the barn clumped together in tiny herds, long fur the same color as Basch’s hood. 

Behind Matthew, Lili was on the deck outside the kitchen. It was a long way off, but if he turned to look, he was able to see her hair and dress. He knew Basch worked hard to get enough money for that one- Lili loved bright spring colors. 

It was all soft quiet ambience. The crow and the goat’s bells were the loudest sounds there.

‘ _ Snow absorbs sound’  _ he remembers his father telling him,  _ ‘thats why its always so quiet in fall and winter.’ _

“...Hey, Basch?”

“...What?”

Matthew took a deep, shaky breath in, “did… you miss me too?”

Basch sighed, and went back to watching the crow. 

“I- yes.”

Matthew leaned in closer to him, “Do you want me to come over more?”

Basch pointedly looked away, “...You’re not the worst company.”

Wind blew over the field, carrying the crow away with it. A few of the goats got up to meander towards the barn.  

“...Basch?”

“What?”

“Roll over.”

He hesitated, but did so anyway. Matthew was close enough that if he shuffled forward a little bit, their noses would touch. 

Basch was definitely flustered now. He locked eyes with Matthew, and his glare - while still a glare, was more… open. Nervousness was closer to the surface than aggression.

“Did you want something?” He grumbled.

“...You have beautiful eyes.”

“You said that already.” His gaze flicked away in embarrassment. 

_ No… don’t look away, please.  _ Matthew pulled his cheek up gently with his hand. Now Basch looked flustered and  _ panicked.  _

“...You’re shivering.” Matthew remarked after awhile.

“No I’m not.”

Matthew trailed his hand down Basch’s side-  _ still so stiff,  _ and pulled his hand up between their faces. Sure enough, it was shaking. Basch scowled, like being angry at it would make it stop. Matthew shifted, and gently used both his thumbs to massage Basch’s hand. 

“Wh- what are you-“

“I can’t tell if you’re cold or scared, so maybe this will fix both.” Matthew said calmly.

“I’m  _ neither.  _ Why would I be scared?”

“Why else would you be shaking?”

Basch didn’t have an answer for that. 

They laid in the snow for maybe half an hour more. A few times, Basch wordlessly slipped his hand out of Matthew’s, and offered his other one. He was still somewhat anxious, Matthew could see, but he wasn’t tense. Basch’s muscles weren’t pulled tight like bow strings when Matthew took an excuse to run his hand down Basch’s side again- ‘in search of his hand.’ If anything, Basch was enjoying the silence.

His shivering did get mildly worse though. 

Matthew nudged his legs forward until they entwined with Basch’s, and reached an arm around his back to pull Basch closer. 

Basch watched him warily, but didn’t complain. So he  _ was _ cold, after all. This close, it was hard for Matthew to keep holding his hands, so he settled for hugging him.

“...Just how lightweight are you?” Basch asked from right below Matthew’s collar bones.

Matthew laughed, “I’m not used to beer, I normally go for wine.”

“I… don’t think that’s how it works.”

“When I drink wine I get less of it. There's more beer in a mug than wine in a glass.” He said, running his hand across the span of Basch’s shoulders. Basch had a very… almost dainty build. 

Matthew wondered what muscles lay hidden beneath his coats. 

“So you’re a pansy.”

“Am not!”

Basch laughed-  _ the most beautiful sound,  _ and curled into him further. Matthew felt his own flush deepen. 

They stayed on the ground as the day changed. Lili was probably long gone from the porch now. Snow started to fall again, and Matthew ran his gloved fingers over Basch’s hood to keep the flakes off. 

All the goats were inside now. The crow sailed low, then worked hard to flap its wings higher - circling up and up. The drink was wearing off, and Matthew was down to a more tipsy state of mind. 

He ran his hand down between Basch’s shoulder blades, eliciting a quiet sigh. 

Then Basch stiffened up.

“What are we doing?”

“We’re laying in the snow while it’s snowing, like idiots.” Matthew answered.

“ _ Why?”  _

He pulled back slightly to look at him. Basch’s eyes fluttered open- all nervous again. 

“...Because I was drunk and you wanted to keep an eye on me where I wouldn’t… break anything I guess?” 

“ ‘Was’?”

“You can’t stay drunk forever, Basch.”

Basch’s hands on his chest started to push. Matthew frowned, but resisted the urge to hold on tighter, and loosened his arms on Basch’s back. 

“So you’re not just spitting nonsense.”

“I- well- kind of? I’m still not sober enough to walk right.” Matthew tried his hand at a reassuring smile, “Why do you ask?”

Too drunk to walk, but sober enough to lie- if only to calm Basch down. 

“I don’t know how much of this I’ll remember, if that helps.”

Basch looked at something off to his right like it stole all his baby goats and swore. Matthew put his hand on Basch’s cheek again, 

“Hey, are you okay-“

Basch kissed him. Basch kissed him- full on the mouth.

It was feather-light, and more gentle and affectionate  than he would ever have expected from a boy who kept his gun by his bed. 

Before Matthew could react- to pull away maybe, or kiss him back- Basch backed off, and buried his face in his chest. 

He was crying. 

“ _ I- I don’t have the damn guts to do this when you’re sober-“  _ He spat, “ _ Because I know you’d reject me for Gilbert. So you better fucking forget this.” _

_ Oh. _

Matthew didn’t know what to say, so he wrapped his arm back around Basch’s waist, and stroked the back of his head. He kept going until Basch’s sobs quieted down. Basch clung to Matthew like he was the only other thing in the world, and Matthew let him- leaning down a little to whisper,

“I’m so sorry.”

Basch responded by nuzzling deeper between his shoulders, “It’s… it’s fine. Not your fault  _ I  _ fell in love.”

They were alone in the field- even the crow was finally gone. Matthew felt himself lull into sleep.

 

                           _____

 

He woke up with a start in his own home the next morning, tucked into his bed with a note from Gilbert and Lili on his nightstand.

Too drunk to walk, but sober enough to lie. His foggy memory pieced everything together. 

...Guess that settled it, then. 

He found Gilbert in his kitchen, trying to make oatmeal  without burning the flakes. They spent the morning together (Matthew nursing a slight hangover,) and set for town around afternoon. 

He came to apologize to Basch and Lili for causing all the trouble, and they wouldn’t meet his eyes. 

The worst part was pretending he didn’t know why.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “There once was a bitter sweet man and they called him Lemon Boy  
> He was growing in my garden and I  
> pulled him out by his hair like a weed  
> But like weeds do he only came and grew back again  
> So I figured this time I might as well let him be  
> Lemon Boy and me started to get along together  
> I helped him plant his seeds and we'd mow the lawn in bad weather  
> It's actually pretty easy being nice to a bitter boy like him  
> So I got myself a citrus friend.”  
> -Lemon boy, Cavetown.
> 
>  
> 
> I know *I* wrote this and all, but I feel so bad for Switzerland,,, he’s trying his best. Liechtenstein is the mvp.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there!! I’ve been thinking about starting on this story for awhile, so i’m glad I can finally get to it :D!! My posting rate is gonna be one chapter up for every new chapter I write, and I have a little bit of a buildup just in case. Please let me know what you think!


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